Mr. Chauvinist Pig,

I am writing to you because I can not let the International Day to End Violence against Women pass by without giving you a piece of my mind.

It has been said time and time again that women's rights are fundamentally human rights. But it seems that you can not understand this. So I will do all I can to make you understand.

First of all, violence is not limited to physical abuse. There are many ways to damage a person's spirit aside from inflicting wounds and bruises. The purple and green marks are in themselves traumatic inscriptions the victim will bear forever. Disrespectful words, false rumors spread, harassment that breeds fear and contempt, and dirty looks that pierce through clothing breaking down one's confidence have the same if not more haunting effect. Store this in that often times not functioning or malfunctioning head of yours: Any act that reduces a person to mere object, any act that challenges one's humanity is a crime no court of this world can pardon.

What to you is a hobby, a favorite past time, of checking girls out (sometimes even grading them), calling them names, and hooting at them is a commodification telling of your lack of moral values. What to you is nothing but an economic bargain (prostitution, sex trafficking, mail-order-brides, human aquarium, prostituition, sex farms, etc.) is the shattered dreams and broken life of the person you are transacting with. What for you is simply putting an independent and aggressive woman to her place (via sexist remarks, the application of a double standard, discrimination in both small things and big things) is a form of oppression because you hold yourself supreme while confining the other to the margins.

I bet that at this point you'd be washing your hands and throwing remarks like "Well, you are a feminist so you are biased," "Males are victims of offense too," "Loosen up. Don't take such things too seriously," and "That's the way society works" straight at me. I am so used to you thinking up a "clever" excuse each time your wrongs are pointed out to you so I'm being truly clever and I'm answering your claims right here, right now.

"Well, you are a feminist so you are biased." Being a feminist doesn't automatically mean being a man-hater. In fact, that is one of the biases men have forced upon feminists to hush them. I am not going to shut up. I will be heard. Feminism is like political orientation, there are many kinds and sub-types within the movement. And stereotypes do not always hold true. Indeed, there are common characteristics but it doesn't warrant boxing one into a preconceived notion. Exert an effort to understand first before you judge. I am a feminist. I do not hate men. In fact, I love a lot of men-my dad, my brothers, my grandpas, my friends, etc. All I want is gender inequality. I am simply pointing out faults because I can not (will not) be blind and deaf. Like they say, all it takes for evil to prosper is for good men and women to simply do nothing.

"Males are victims of offense too." Now, when did I deny that? I am not denying that. That is true. Men, women, adults, children, Filipinos, Americans are all victims of violence at one point or another. Human suffering is a reality. It just so happens that women are common victims. It is because of the prevalence of violence against women that feminists, women's groups, and humanists have stepped up. Advocacy campaigns are not limited to a certain gender, age, nationality, religion, and whatever class. You are free to fight for the ideal you believe in. I have chosen to concentrate on the plight of women because it is something I am aware of, I experience, and I feel strongly against. I am a feminist because of other women.

"Loosen up. Don't take such things too seriously." That attitude is what has exactly allowed gender discrimination to exist. People do not take others' rights seriously. I will not be told to let this pass because this is something that shouldn't be let pass. Nothing is as important as morality, as respect, as equality, as freedom, and as justice.

"That's the way society works." Patriarchy indeed has been the norm in most (if not all) societies but it doesn't mean that it's correct. When one examines patriarchy, one will learn that it is something imposed by men. It is an attempt to maintain power institutionalized and perpetuated through socialization. Human judgment is not flawless. Any comment that we should stick to tradition, follow all the rules, and stick to what we've been used to is plain bull. Change should be applied where it is needed. Our society has long operated on a dominant-dominated ideology (the rich vs. the poor, the educated vs. the manipulated, the powerful vs. the subservient, and of course males vs. females) and it is about time that the walls be broken down. I have always believed that a reason for humanity's folly is the view that power, wealth, and dominance are what we should all strive for. History has shown us that it is love, care, cooperation, unity, equality, creative positive inner strength which yielded positive results. But we keep on insisting on these patriarchal values. A healthy dose of both types of values are what we need. Reason AND faith, the intellect AND emotions, science AND art and not one against the other are the elements that will make us move forward. We all need to recognize that.

It all boils down to a matter of respect. "Do not do unto others what you don't want others to do to you," said Confucius. "Love others as you love yourself," said Jesus Christ. "Look at women's rights the same way you look at men's rights since they're the same-they're both human rights," I say.

Women have been oppressed, violated, treated as inferior in so many ways each and every day for so long a time now. We've had enough. Mr. Chauvinist Pig, I do hope you mend your ways. I do not wish to argue with you but I will not keep quiet amidst your machismo and discriminating acts.

Babae ako! Itataguyod ko ang aking pagka-babae! Lalaban ako at hindi mangingimi, lalo na sa mga katulad mo!

Sincerely (but NOT YOURS because I belong to no one),

Rachelle (in behalf of every woman who wants to speak out to chauvinist pigs)